Breaking up is hard to do

Breaking up with someone when you aren’t together is a concept that I was introduced to a few weeks ago. An ex of mine basically broke up with me even though we aren’t currently dating, or considering dating each other. It started out as a random conversation and quickly progressed into how much he cares about me but we can’t be together. There is something missing – when I asked what that was, I was given the typical "I don’t know, something is just not there" verbal vomit. To make me feel even better he said that it makes him uncomfortable when I hug him or give him pecks (I hug everyone!) because it makes him think that he might want to be with me, when he doesn’t. HUH?!? WTF?!? I asked him several times why we were having this conversation but my simple question must have sent his brain into overdrive and he couldn’t seem to answer.

I was so perplexed by this conversation that I of course, told all my girlfriends and we all came to the conclusion that he’s wacko jacko and has lost it. It got me thinking about the best break up lines that I’ve heard from friends, guys who have broken up with me, and lines that I have used to get out of a relationship. Here are my favorite in no particular order:

• I don’t see myself marrying you. Ever.
• I think I see you more as a friend than anything else.
• By the way, I moved to Chicago three days ago.
• I think of you more as a brother/sister.
• I am breaking up with you now before you get too attached to me….so I am doing you a sort of favor, aren’t I?
• I don’t want you to feel like I’m breaking up with you. I just can’t be in a relationship with you anymore.
• Remember when you slept with my roommate and I forgave you? I’ve been harboring this against you since and I just can’t do this anymore. By the way, she has herpes.
• There was a time when you took my breath away, but now you are just sucking the life out of me.

And my personal favorite – You just aren’t enough of a bitch.

Another installment of why I shouldn’t listen to music at work

Most days I listen to music on my ipod while I’m working. Mostly it’s so I can tune out the incessant ringing of my desk phone. Also because I have the extreme misfortune to have the cubical located between the worlds two loudest women. Sometimes I wish my desk could be located in a sound proof bubble where I can’t hear anyone around me….

…right…back to what I was talking about. So I’ve been listening to the GLEE soundtrack because well…I’m one of those 29 year old Gleek people that obsessively watch the show. It feels like the unhealthy addiction to 90210 I had from 1995-2000 (I was ten when it aired in 1990, I wasn’t allowed to watch it then). In fact, sometimes I still watch re-runs on SoapNet. No one can forget the episode where Donna gets drunk at the prom, and then Mrs. Teasley tells her that she’s not going to be able to graduate. The whole gang bands together and goes up against the PTA or whatever. It’s a very moving moment in TV history…or something. DONNA MARTIN GRADUATES.

….so I’m listening to the GLEE soundtrack and "Jesse’s Girl" comes on and it was almost like I forget where I am because I started kinda dancing in my chair. I can tell when I’m singing out loud loudly, but sometimes I just forget to not sing out loud. So I’m dancing in my chair a little bit (which slightly resembles someone having a seizure) and then I guess I started singing to myself. Once again, the big boss man comes up behind me and as I round out the chorus, he starts laughing. His laugh is hard to miss so I start blushing and we have our usual banter of how I shouldn’t quit my day job to take up a music career.

Maybe it’s just the songs I’m singing that he doesn’t like?

NYC or Bust

First let me say I’m sorry for the time in between posts. The last few weeks have been INSANE and I haven’t really had time to sit down and write. Bad excuse right? I know, and I’m sorry.

Last week I was able to spend some time in NYC with friends. It’s been about 5 years since I was last in the city and it felt like no time had passed. My trip started out with a drive out to the camp that I worked at for several summers in Pennsylvania. My good friend Megan was having her wedding at camp and I was so excited to get there. Despite finding myself lost (who needs 18 different interchanges to get to Penn?! Time to rework your highway system NJ & NY) I made it out to camp in about 4 hours. I arrived the day before the wedding to help out with whatever Megan needed and was pleased to find so many of my old camp buddies were already there. The funny thing about camp is that no matter how long you have been gone, or how long it’s been since you’ve seen the people there…it feels like coming home to family. I can’t describe it…

I am quite proud to say that I did the makeup for the entire wedding party. It was so much fun! I’ll post pictures when the bride sends me some. The wedding was wonderful – the weather cooperated, everyone looked amazing, the food was great, the booze was flowing (I’m pretty sure I hooked myself up to a straight drip of vodka), and everyone was dancing. My favorite moment of the night was when the camp director David got up on stage and lead the crowd in a rousing rendition of Sweet Caroline. EVERYONE was singing and dancing along. Classic! You know what’s not so great though? Being hungover, and having to drive 3 hours back into the city while dealing with traffic. Yup, that was how I spent the day after the wedding. At least it only took me 3 hours to get back, instead of my previous 4 hour trip. I didn’t get lost – surprising!

The next four days were spent roaming around the city. I’ll post more on the things I did soon. It would be hard to fit everything into one post.

Unless you want to hear about the amazing blisters I gave myself because I wasn’t wearing shoes made for walking miles and miles. I eventually found myself in a Foot Locker buying child sized sneakers (what? they’re cheaper) because I’m a moron and didn’t pack walking shoes. Because I could go on and on about this for hours. Or more like 5 minutes because then the story gets boring.

I’m thinking I’ll try and get back to the city sometime around Christmas or early next year. I still need to see Wicked and American Idiot.

During my recent trip to New York, I was able to make it out to Liberty Island where the Statue of Liberty is located. Seeing it up close was amazing and I don’t think I’ll ever forget how massive she looks.

*Tip: If you ever find yourself wanting to visit Liberty or Ellis Island, make sure you get there early. The lines can be extremely long if you get there in the afternoon.

NYC Bound

I’m leaving tonight for New York! Well…technically my first stop on my trip is New York, but then I’m leaving immediately upon landing in my rental car and driving out to the camp I worked at for numerous summers. A good friend of mine is getting MARRIED on Friday and I’m lucky to be in attendance. But after that…after that I’m going back to New York to spend 5 glorious days in the city. Can you feel how excited I am? If the speed at which I’m typing is any indication, then you’d know how excited I am.

There are 1000 things that I need to do before I leave, and I don’t seem to have the time to do them. Damn you full time job! You are cramping my style.

Last night during my laundry/packing frenzy, I realized I only need about half the clothes that I had intended to take with me. But now that I’m sitting and thinking about it – I’m going to repack what I took out. I’d rather have lots of outfit choices than not enough. I have this horrible paranoia about not packing enough clothes and being stranded somewhere. Mainly I worry about being stranded in NY without my clothes – because I probably can’t afford to even buy a pair of socks in that city.

I also had issues when packing my carry on. Since I’m getting off the plane and driving for three hours, I wanted to pack a few things so I could freshen up before we land. But then I started to remember what I can and can’t bring on the plane. Do they allow toothbrushes? Can I bring my makeup? Will they laugh at me when they see the size of my makeup bag? So I’ve opted to just pull over at some point on my journey out to camp to brush my teeth and freshen up my makeup. I haven’t seen some of these people in five years. I can’t go there looking all haggard and tired. Right?

Playing with the Boys

There is something about the Top Gun soundtrack that just gets the blood pumping in the morning. Or maybe that’s just me daydreaming of Tom Cruise and Val Kilmer playing volleyball on the beach with their shirts off. Of course, that’s back when they were both attractive. I can’t say that I would want to watch either of them play with their shirts of anymore….

*Sigh*

17 May, 2010 22:26

I feel like I’ve returned from the land of the crazies. Last week was one of the most stressful weeks that I can remember having in years. In an email to a friend earlier today, I described myself as looking strung out – similar to what a crack addict would look like if they didn’t get their fix.

This exam was hard people! I can’t tell you how excited I am that it’s over. I won’t bore you with the details but at 5:00 on Friday I began the next stage in my life. Three hours later, I emerged with a giant smile on my face knowing the hardest part was over. I was tempted to start a giant bonfire in my backyard and burn my books in some sort of ceremonial tribute, but decided against it. You never know when you might need them again right?!?! That being said I know my non-official scores and I’m okay with them. We’ll see what happens when I receive my officials scores in about six weeks, which will contain my analytical writing portion.

Someone asked me today how I could say the hardest part was over considering I haven’t started the program yet. Well, I can handle the admissions paperwork, the essay writing, the recommendations. I can handle the long days of class, having a job, and studying at night. It’s the preparing for it all that I have trouble with. It’s the stress of the unknown. Plus, I am a horrible test taker. I always have been. I was given special permission in high school to take my SAT’s in a separate room from others because I found it to be too distracting. The rest is the easy part for me.

I want to say a big thank you to those people who have supported me during this insane process. The text messages, good luck emails, Jamba Juice runs, and phone calls reassuring me that although things are rough right now, I’m doing exactly what I need to do to make this a better life for myself and those I will help in the future. You are truly the best friends a girl could ever ask for. You know who you are.